Aging

Today was a bit of a struggle for me. My body feels like it’s been hit by a dump truck and I can’t wait to get bad to bed in a couple hours.

This was all of course my fault. My best friend was proposing to his long time girlfriend on Saturday and I was involved in the all day festivities. It was a magical day overall and I had a blast celebrating with close friends.

The day made me realize just how much we’ve grown and that we’re all entering the next phases of our lives which is likely marriage and possibly children in the next few years.

The next day (and today) was a reminder that aging also has some downsides. Mainly that my body and brain can’t keep up with long days of celebration. This is an adjustment that I'll need to constantly remind myself of. I am no longer in my 20s.

Why we do this

It’s a cold and rainy day in San Francisco. I can’t really remember the last time it rained in the city. Much needed change of pace .

I really loved this Tweet and thread.

https://twitter.com/nonmayorpete/status/1320862421792124928?s=20

Do not complain Startups are hard and everyone knows it. Complaining will just make the experience worse. Instead of looking at your feet, look to the horizon. Find the opportunities within the gaps. Find the solutions for the problems.

Not everything in startup land is fun. Most if it is really freakin’ hard. The beauty behind startups is that there’s always something keeping you energized and coming back for more.

I had the chance to work on some awesome projects this week. That helped keep my mental state and energy levels high despite long hours and some tough breaks. I’m exhausted at this point, but I’m ready to get back at it on Monday.

A return to normalcy?

On Monday, I wrote about how I was going to start shaking the bad COVID-19 habits that I’ve developed over the last few months. I’m happy to report back and say that it’s been a great week so far and I’m feeling awesome.

I’ve started going to bed earlier, waking up at the same time every day and going through a normal morning routine. My workout schedule is back to pre COVID days. I’m starting to feel well… somewhat normal again.

Of course in reality this is far from the truth. We keep hitting new all time highs on the COVID meter. Even San Francisco that has largely kept everything under control has spiked in the number of new infections. This prompted Mayor Breed to close down indoor dining for the time being.

Sophia and I were fortunately able to enjoy a few nice safe indoor dinners over the last couple of weeks. It was nice and reminded me of the good ole pre-pandemic days.

Unfortunately, all signs point to a long winter pandemic. Signs of a vaccine on a way are great, but we have no idea when it will be available for the masses.

I’m enjoying the feeling of going back to normal, but I’m also not getting my hopes up and preparing for the worst.

Short-term memory

Unfortunately in the world of business and especially startups, you’re going to get punched in the face a lot.

It happened quite a bit at my last job. It happened with every side business/hustle that I’ve started to date. And it’s happening more than ever at Secfi right now.

Truth is that it really sucks when it happens whatever the situation. It could be a deal you thought was closed gone wrong. Perhaps a vendor that guaranteed something fell through. Maybe an employee that you trusted decided to go elsewhere or you didn’t get that promotion that you were promised.

Whatever the circumstance or who’s fault, I’ve learned that life has a funny way of finding new ways to punch you in the face.

Unfortunately I’ve realized that in life there’s not that much you can do about this. Outside factors will always apply no matter how much you wish or pray that it didn’t. The only thing that you can control is how you react to getting punched.

It’s easy to get caught up in these situations and let it dwell. This only leads to a bad situation getting worse as it affects other areas of your life.

This is why short-term memory and a great mental model is possibly one of the most important aspects of success. You can’t control what happens but you can control your reaction. Whenever something shitty happens to me at work, I try to remind myself to have short-term memory.

It’s okay to be upset for a short time period. We’re all human. But when time comes to move on, it’s best to put that last situation in the rear view and focus on the new task at hand.

Routines and disconnecting

My life is a beautiful mess right now. I don’t mean to sound dramatic. I am healthy and generally happy right now, but I feel like I am all over the place. I am drowning in work and personal life commitments are catching up quickly. A beautiful mess is how’d I best describe the situation.

Work is getting busier than ever which is a good thing for someone at a startup. I am also grateful to be a fortunate personal situation with lots of activities and commitments. Nonetheless, there are so many hours in the day and I feel like I am all over the place… all the time.

It’s easy to blame COVID-19 for derailing my routine, but the reality is that this was always going to happen with my workload increasing and I have no one else to blame but myself for this.

Going forward, I am looking to address this problem with two achievable goals:

1) I am going to get back into a defined work routine rather than the COVID work routine. Getting up at the same time everyday. Working out on a defined schedule. Planning to separate work/personal better at home. These are all things that I once did but was derailed due to the COVID excuse. We’re still in a pandemic, but it’s time I get back to my normal routine which makes me more efficient and happier.

2) I am going to disconnect more by leaving my phone and/or laptops away when it’s time to focus on personal and leisurely activities. Work has gotten more demanding and I have responded by being plugged in more than I ever have. I need to be more present when it comes to life so I can enjoy the moments with my friends and loved ones. I have started leaving my phone when I go outside to take a break or go into nature. It’s paid huge dividends so far and I feel recharged when I get back.

These are two difficult but achievable goals. I look forward to living a healthier and happier life once I accomplish them.

What to make of this mess?

As I write this, Joe Biden is in the driver’s seat to take the White House. He’s the favorite in Arizona, Nevada, and Pennsylvania. Georgia is a close race and a toss-up. There are votes to be counted still but they all seem to be favoring Biden as the lead gets narrower as more absentee ballots are counted which lean heavily in Biden’s favor.

Am I happy that Donald Trump is out of office? Of course. He’s a divisive and racist President that has no business representing the free world. Like most Americans, the election results will likely be an underwhelming result.

The White House will be won in a close call. The Senate seems to be headed towards staying Republican. Yes, there are more votes to be counted still and once the dust settles, it may not be as close as we all thought. But there’s no doubting that the blue wave didn’t happen as we had hoped.

Most of my friends and colleagues are saying the same thing. They can’t believe how many people out there are still voting for Trump.

It’s pretty obvious that we are in an unprecedented time in this country’s history. We are a deeply divided country trending towards more divisiveness. Both sides are treating each other like we’re rival nations and it’s getting nastier and uglier.

The next four years are going to be a pivotal moment in our country’s history.

Can Joe Biden and Kamala Harris unite this country? I remain hopeful, but we’ll have to wait and see. The message right now from the Democratic camp is unity and it seems that is priority for the Democratic agenda.

Going forward, we’re going to need to take a step back as a country. Both the Republican and Democratic parties need to do some soul searching. Although both the left and the right like to blame the other side, everyone needs to shoulder some of the blame for this mess of a state we are in right now.

The caricatures of the left and right by the opposing side is far from the truth. There’s good people on both sides despite what we may believe or what we see on social media.

We are at a crossroads right now as a country. We have work to do, but the forever optimist in me believes in the future of this country.

My week of thoughts

I took a week off from writing as I took my Series 24 last Tuesday and then played catch-up on work and life. also I took today off and will be taking most of tomorrow off for the election. I look forward to getting back to a more steady routine and also writing again. My post today will be a brain dump of my thoughts over the last week with no major structure.

I passed my Series 24. It was an absolutely brutal test. Many people warned me, but I had to take it and fail the first time to actually believe it. I’m proud of myself for bouncing back and getting it done. Failing the first time wasn’t easy and it took a big toll on me for a few days, but it was a great learning experience that nothing in life is easy.

With me passing the Series 24, I have much more liability on my shoulders as I take on the CEO role of our broker-dealer. I am very much a GSD (get shit done) type of person that likes to move fast, but the regulatory stuff is not something you want to move fast on. I need to be patient and take my time as I work through broker-dealer related work.

Election day is tomorrow and anxiety levels seem to be at all time highs. The market isn’t responding well and the last week was the worst week since March. To be honest, I don’t think the market will respond well if either candidate wins, but will likely stabilize once things settle down in a couple weeks… hopefully.

I golfed my best round and shot a 94 at Presidio on Saturday. It was an absolutely awesome ball-striking day marred with an insane amount of 3 putts. Today, I played Peacock Gap which is a fantastic course and much easier than Presidio. I proceeded to drive the ball better than I have ever driven it and got my putting under control. Of course, my irons were horrid. Golf is a tough game where one thing always seems to be off — it’s so exceedingly rare where you are playing well in all aspects. I couldn’t help but think how similar this is to real life. It’s rare for everything in your life to be perfect at a given moment and you need to know where things stand and adjust accordingly.

My golf addiction is real. I have spent more money on golf than any other hobby in my life and well… it feels good. It feels great to be excited about something other than work. It’s helped make me work more efficiently and gives me something to think about when I am not working. Everyone should have hobbies and things they can turn to besides work. I’ve been on the other side with only work in my life and it is not healthy.

My week of gratitude

Today I am grateful for well.. gratitude. I have been much happier this past week despite the stresses of working while study for a test due to my gratitude practice. Writing about it in my blog helped me level set my mind every day. I am happy I did it.

It’s easy to get caught up in what you don’t have in life and that want can ruin your mindset and even day.

Something silly that I realized over the weekend while playing golf:

It’s easy to be envious of a scratch golfer’s swing. If you focus too much on trying to achieve that swing and score like that person, you’re going to forget that you’re playing golf which in itself is great.

Realizing this made me enjoy the day much better despite not playing as well as I hoped.

I’m headed in lockdown mode as I make a final push to study for the next 5-6 hours for my test. I take it tomorrow and I am confident but cautiously optimistic. The test got me once and I need to be sure I don’t leave anything on the table.

Confidence

Today I am grateful for my great group of friends who I trust and know will always stand by me. I am insanely fortunate to be surrounded by lots of great people in my life and I wouldn’t be where I am without them.

I was taking a quick client call the other day while walking with a friend and she asked how I am always so confident on the phone. I explained to her that this is nothing more than just lots of practice and learning.

I told her that you don’t “sound confident” on the phone. You are simply just confident because you know the material you are talking about in and out and can speak to it without breaking a sweat. It’s really not that different from any other craft.

I am writing this right now about to leave for my Sunday morning tee time with friends. I am excited to play and have a level of confidence I’ve never had before going into a round. This is all following my worst round of golf ever on Tuesday.

So why am I confident? I spent 2 hours Friday and another 2 hours on Saturday practicing my swing and making tweaks to fix my mistakes on Tuesday. Of course this is still golf and things can go awry very quickly but my practice over the last couple days have me at least in a great mindset going into the round.

Hopefully things go well today. If not, there’s always more time to practice.

Bar raising

Today I am grateful for the good food in my life. Food is one of my passions and my life revolves around my next meal.

I am stuck studying today for my Series 24 exam which is on Tuesday. It’s not easy being stuck inside studying on a Saturday, but I grabbed some dim sum from Good Mongkok on my way in to my study spot so some fire har gow always helps put me in a better mood.

The test is a monster and I am not taking it lightly the second time around. Failing the test the first time around was quite honestly maybe the first time I have ever failed an exam in my life. It was a huge learning experience for me and made me realize that as my life and career goes on, the bar is always going to be raised.

It’s up to me to level up as well. I’ve got to constantly grow and refine my craft in everything I do.

"Oh Shit" moments

Today I am grateful for the sun. My mood is always just a little bit more cheerful on a nice sunny day. There’s nothing like going on a walk when the sun is beaming down on you. I’m staring at a cloudless San Francisco sky right now on a Friday afternoon and I am grateful to be here.

I had a call with an executive that we partner with yesterday and we discussed our business model quite a bit. I mentioned that it is a challenge convincing people to act on their stock options despite us genuinely feeling like this is the best option for the individual. People get busy and stock options fall on the back burner unfortunately.

The executive said that he feels that we need to be creating an emotional response in order for people to realize the true value. In other words, we need to be creating “Oh Shit” moments. These emotional responses force people to act in a fight or flight response and that’s exactly what we need to get someone to the table to act on their stock options.

We’ve been trying to do this quite a bit over the last year and we’ve been successful in many ways, but there’s much more for us to do here. We’ll definitely be focusing on this in the next few months as we ramp up our marketing efforts.

Health

Today I am grateful for my health. While not perfect by any means, my body largely cooperates with me and allows me to live an active life style that helps me be who I am.

My body was completely falling apart earlier this week. Both my achilles and calves felt like they were about to tear and I felt physically and mentally exhausted. With some rest, I was able to run 5 miles today. I know I need to treat my body better in order to be able to keep doing what I love so I’ll try to focus on that in my 30s.

I am about 6.5 hours behind schedule to the hectic work day today. Shit happens.

Reopening SF

Today I am grateful for the city of San Francisco. I was born and raised here so I am biased and I know the city has taken a lot of heat lately. But I consider myself fortunate to be born here. I wouldn’t have wanted to grow up anywhere else in the world and I am glad for everything the city has to offer.

On the topic of SF, the city announced a lot of plans to loosen COVID-19 restrictions including increasing indoor dining capacity and offices for non-essential employees.

I know there’s a lot of mixed feelings here as there is still the virus looming out there but I am really excited to see the city start to reopen slowly. We have largely been very conservative in regards to our reopening given our numbers and I think it’s about time.

The city has largely controlled COVID-19 with low infection rates compared to the rest of California (and the country). There are many businesses struggling and I hope that people can get back on track.

We’re not in the clear yet though and San Franciscans will need to continue to be diligent in slowing the spread. I have high hopes for my city and know that we can do it.

Market sizing

Today I am grateful for the ability to play golf. It’s an insanely frustrating game but even on a bad day, I am out in nature encouraging the fresh air and it sure as hell beats a lot of other things.

I had a call today with a friend of a friend who needed some help with her Peloton stock options. She had a common problem that I’ve heard hundreds of times by now. She didn’t plan around her stock options and now she’s in a tough situation. It’s the main reason why Secfi exists as a company.

In discussing her situation, I heard another common thing I hear from our clients, “I never would have thought the stock price would be where it is today.”

Of course, this is a bit of a product of where the market is right now with tech stocks valued at insane multiples. With that said, one of the most humbling things for many investors I’ve spoken to is how wildly wrong they are on market cap predictions.

People tend to forget that it’s more common for a $1b company to turn into a $10b company then for a new startup to become a $1b company.

This makes sense when you think of human nature.

It’s much easier to say the market cap for a company is a smaller finite number that can be calculated based on some back of the napkin math. It’s much harder to find all the possible flaws in the estimate and market participants that were not included.

Globalization and technology has also rapidly advanced connectivity expanding potential market sizes at exponential rates. Companies are now reaching untapped potential easier and faster. And of course, growth of technology and data has created a much larger market than ever imagined.

I explained to my friend at Peloton about how bullish I was about the company. I told her that yes the company may be 3x what she thought the stock price would be right now, but to come back to in 5 years and see where it is then. She may be even more surprised.

Turning to gratitude

I’m back after a long weekend of activities. I really do enjoy the time spent with friends especially during the quarantine but I’m starting to feel more and more exhausted starting off the week. I am no longer staying out late and generally home and in bed at reasonable times nowadays. Despite this, just doing basic activities like going to the beach and dinner on Saturday can really floor me the next couple days.

I imagine this is just part of getting older and I’ll need to adjust going forward. Perhaps one day or night of activities on a weekend is enough for this 30 year old. My body is speaking to me and I need to listen.

On another note, I started studying for the second taking of my Series 24 yesterday. I now know how the test is structured and how to better study for it… which is to study every damn rule and regulation in the book. Given the need for me to pass, I’m going to be taking it very seriously over the next 8 days and likely overstudying. This goes against my philosophy of studying just enough to pass these standardized tests, but there’s too much at stake this time around.

It’s going to be a tough week and the material is well a bit dry but it’s something that needs to be done. To keep my brain fresh, I’m hoping to write a blog post every day this week and start every post with writing something I am grateful for. It’s something that helps me navigate tough weeks and helps me keep the negative energy at bay.

Today, I am grateful for the ability to work and support myself. While this may seem like a given right, not everyone is fortunately able to work a job that can allow themselves to live comfortably.

Creativity during work from home

Howard Lindzon wrote about his struggle about finding inspiration due to the pandemic. It was a timely blog post as I am going through the exact same feeling right now.

Being at home feels like the same thing over and over again. I see friends on the weekend and go out to eat, but there’s not really that much excitement. I am a people person and like seeing my coworkers and shooting the shit.

I live for in-person work events and am my best being around like minded people.

This unfortunately has gone all out the window during the pandemic. Zoom is a good bridge, but it leaves a lot to be desired.

I try to combat this feeling by finding new hobbies like golf and seeing friends on the weekends. But there’s a large void in my life due to work from home.

My plan is to take a remote week of work somewhere in the next month in order to try to get a change of scenery. I’m hoping that gives me some creative juices.

Controlled emotion

We had an all-hands meeting last week where a few of us broke out into rooms and shared what we miss about the office and working together. I came to a funny realization halfway through the conversation when I realized that I was simply just venting to my coworkers about all my frustrations. It quickly came to me that one of the things I miss most about going to the office is the ability to vent to my coworkers.

My job is a bit of an emotional rollercoaster at times. Often times, I’ll be on back to back calls for hours at a time. I’ll go from a deep (and often) heated negotiation with a client to a friendly meeting with a new hire where I need to put a smile on.

Short-term memory is important as it’s imperative that I don’t let one bad call ruin my next. Of course, this is all easier said than done. We’re all human and emotions run deep. Something stuck in my mind can definitely affect the rest of my day and my interactions with people as well.

One of the big tools that have helped me control my emotions throughout the day is meditation. Practicing meditation every day helps me take a step back and realize what’s truly going through my head. When shit really hits the fan, I do a guided meditation that can help even if it’s just a few minutes.

Often times, when I need a break, I’ll go and exercise as well. A quick run, workout video or yoga session does wonders for me in helping control my emotions throughout the day when I can afford a longer break.

And lastly, when things really get bad. I call some of my coworkers to vent. While it’s not the same as turning around and venting to someone in person, a quick Zoom vent session does wonders.

A new day and age

The Nasdaq is rallying among talks about the stimulus. With the Fed printing money, it appears that nothing can really derail this stock market. Even a contentious presidential election may not be enough to turn the Nasdaq away. And yes, there is still a global pandemic happening right now. I for one am ready for the holidays and for 2021 to be over. It’s going to be crazy Q4.

While discussing COVID-19 among friends, we’re all in agreement that this is a new day and age. My view on the pandemic is that it may seem like new trends were created because of coronavirus, but in reality, what we are seeing is an acceleration of trends that were already in motion.

Remote work and teleconferencing were going to be a staple soon enough. Companies were already trending that way. COVID-19 just accelerated that trend perhaps 10 years forward. People complained about San Francisco and New York and bragged about leaving well before COVID-19. They just now have an ability to keep their high paying job while moving to the suburbs so they’re using the pandemic as an excuse to get out.

One thing we can all agree on is that this is a new day and age that we haven’t seen before. The old heads are ripping their hairs out at the insane valuations on the stock market. Yet again, we are only really touching the surface of what tech is able to accomplish. A 100x revenue multiple is quite insane when compared to other comps, but people are forgetting that these companies are now growing faster than ever before due to the leverage of technology.

It has never been easier to start a company or raise capital. TAMs for businesses and industries are growing at levels never seen before. Globalization is growing… rapidly. There are more “unicorns” than ever before. Perhaps the mark of success will shift from being a unicorn to a decacorn. It may sound insane, but it’s coming faster than you think.

My new addiction

I played another 18 holes today. That’s after playing a round on Monday and Thursday. I am officially addicted to golf. Sophia jokingly hates my new addiction as it takes time away from us spending time together and all my guy friends and I do is talk golf when we see each other.

My girlfriend’s needs aside, golf has been an awesome hobby for me. It gives me something to be excited and passionate about outside of work. It’s competitive but at the same time relaxing. There’s really no better feeling then being on the course on a gorgeous day.

Most of all, I love golf because it’s a temporary escape from the day to day. I am focused solely on playing the game and my shots. I leave my phone in my bag and don’t check it for the entire round.

My swing is all over the place and the game can be frustrating often, but even when I play like shit, it’s the perfect escape and I would do it all day long.

Success and envy

I’m not entirely sure most of my friends know exactly what I do on a day to day basis. They know I work for a fintech startup, but most aren’t in the startup or venture capital world so there’s usually glazed eyes when I describe what I do.

The ones that do get it however always want to know what the hottest startup is so they can work there and get some equity. It’s also a bit funny to realize how naïve some people are when it comes to equity. Most underestimate how much people really get paid out at IPO. A lot also don’t realize that it’s when you join a company.

This Friday afternoon ended with news of a company that we work with getting acquired. I had a particularly interest in this company because well, everyone that I talked to from there was just a genuinely good person and I was more than happy to help them with their situation.

Today after the announcement, they are all millionaires and some even multi-millionaires.

I am beyond excited for them as I can only imagine what it feels like to read a news headline and realize that your net worth has just skyrocketed. On the other hand, I am human and am a little bit envious.

It’s a constant battle at my job. Being genuinely happy for my friends who just made it big, but at the same time wish that I was in their position. Part of my job is to do this every single day. I help people who are paper rich become actually rich.

I can’t say that I’ve completely gotten over the envy, but I’ve learned to deal with it and realize that success is not a zero sum game. These are the same people rooting for both me and Secfi’s success.

My time will come one day and I know these same people that I supported will be there for me when it happens.

For now, I am ecstatic and will continue to support my friends…. and make them buy dinner next time I see them.