Impermanence

It’s been a weird and difficult morning for me.

I started off the day with an early wake-up as Colin has started to show signs that he’s ready to drop down to 1 nap. He’s been an amazing sleeper, but he has been tossing and turning in his bed for an hour before falling asleep, and also has been waking up early which he hasn’t really done since he started sleeping through the night.

The writing on the wall is that he’s now a toddler which means going down to 1 nap and having a lot more different needs in life. It’ll be a slight change with pros and cons, but more so Sophia and I were kind of in shock that we are now in this position of dealing with a toddler as it felt like just yesterday we were taking home a baby.

There were moments where I wish I could freeze time a bit. Colin at this age is one of those moments and while I’m excited for him to grow, it is another reminder of the impermanent nature of life.

On that topic, I was also dealt a curve ball this morning as I found out that a friend of mine who is my age of 35 is battling cancer. It was out of the blue and I was just texting him about meeting up a football game a couple weeks ago. It was a big shock this morning that someone so young with a new baby could be dealt something like this. It was hard not to imagine that it could have been me.

He seems optimistic and knowing him, I have no doubt that he’s going to kick cancer’s ass. But it’s yet another remind how fragile life is. I know that the impermanent nature of life is what makes life special, but at times, the changes and curve balls of life makes things sad and scary.